72 Seasons to Be Cheerful

 

72 is an important number for Metallica. It’s the age of both frontman James Hetfield and sticksman Lars Ulrich and it’s also the number of years since they last produced a decent album. It feels that way at least. But joking aside, 72 Seasons is a 77-minute behemoth (why didn’t they cut out one of the songs and make it 72?) and it seems like they’re finally back on the right track.

Because I’m impatient and perhaps an idiot, I spent £20 on a ticket to a pre-release “listening party” at a cinema in Hull a mere five hours before the album became available on Spotify.  Having spent this £20, I was qualified to spend a further £35 (including postage) on an exclusive t-shirt commemorating the event. I passed on this, but two guys who were in the cinema lobby when I arrived hadn’t. They clearly wanted to present the metal equivalent of Harry Enfield’s “I’m considerably richer than yow” to their fellow metalheads. Wankers.

I avoided the eye-wateringly expensive pouches of sweets and buckets of popcorn, heading to my reclining seat – the way metal should be enjoyed by elderly people such as myself. Some yoofs two rows back were amusing themselves claiming that screen 2 was showing Megadeth and then laughing like hyenas. I’m not sure why they even thought this funny. Megadeth would clearly be showing on screen 18 anyway (a Rust in Peace gag for you there).

A man sat next to me in the seat he’d reserved and started talking. Great. It’s not just gigs where I attract the talkers, apparently. He told me he’d been at the pre-release playback of the Black Album in London way back in ’91 and I have to admit I was a bit jealous. As I was only 16 at the time, I hadn’t been allowed to go. Why hadn’t I just told my mum I was going to stay at a mate’s house instead? What a moron!

We speculated whether we would be getting straight into the album or because we were in a cinema, if there’d be a load of trailers and other bumph.

There were trailers and other bumph. We were treated to previews of yet another Transformers offering and The Fast and the Furious 35. Oh, and there’s going to be a Barbie film. That’s the doll, not outdoor cooking, Australians readers.

And then the Metallica logo appeared on the screen. “Fuck me!” proclaimed the man next to me, clearly way louder than he intended and much to the amusement of the yoofs two rows back.

Before long, the four band members appeared on the screen in black and white, making them look even older than they actually were. They sat on a couch and made attempts at jokes about cinemas and popcorn that some people seated near me actually laughed at. Bloody sycophants.

JUST GET ON WITH IT!

Track 1, the title track. We’d all already heard that and I must admit, I reckon it’s the best of the four singles that were released before the album. Even Kirk banging on about waking up and picking up his guitar and the universe sending him the main riff to this song didn’t put me off, even though it clearly was a load of bollocks. But the song itself is fantastic. Fast bits, slow bits, killer riffage. It’s 7 minutes that seems like 3, which is definitely a good sign. A smattering of applause filled the theatre at the end, like Norwegians on a freshly-landed plane.

And then we were on to the first truly new song, Rob referring to it as a “jam” before it started. Shadows Follow opens with something that sounds like leftovers from the Black Album and then develops into a groovy, Sabbathesque affair. Very promising.

Next up, Screaming Suicide – another of the singles. I didn’t think this was up to much when I first heard it, but it has since grown on me. The NWOBHM-inspired main riff that sounds like something from the Kill ‘Em All days is actually a real powerhouse and I’m sure this song will become a live favourite.

Sleepwalk My Life Away with its bass and drums intro is slow to get going and when it does, it sounds like the main riff from Enter Sandman has been reworked. Whether that’s deliberate or not, it’s quite clever, because it gives the song a certain amount of familiarity. And there’s nothing wrong with plagiarising your own stuff, right?

You Must Burn! with the exclamation mark Lars thought was important to mention twice before it was played has a bit of a Sad But Truey vibe to it. It’s heavy and chugs along nicely and there are further hints of Black Sabbath thrown into the mix.

And then we’re at the end of side one for cassette fans or the end of side two for vinyl enthusiasts. Lux Æterna was the first single Metallica had released from this album some months ago and everyone in the room nodded their heads approvingly for 3 minutes. More applause.

Crown of Barbed Wire is pretty heavy, but it may take a few listens before it really sticks. After five or six plays, for me, it’s the Escape of 72 Seasons.

Chasing Light takes a little while to warm up, but once it gets goings it’s absolutely worth it.

If Darkness Had a Son was my least favourite of the four singles before hearing the whole album. This opinion hasn’t changed, but that doesn’t mean it’s in any way a bad song. It actually sounds like something from the Death Magnetic era, but at least it doesn’t sound as if the drums were recorded over the phone.

The start of Too Far Gone? puts me in mind of No Remorse from Kill ‘Em All – yes, I know I’m comparing a lot of new stuff with a lot of old stuff, but they’re really making me do it with some of the nostalgic-sounding riffs on this album. Super melodic harmonies in the chorus were unexpected, but an interesting change for ‘Tallica. There’s even a Thin Lizzy-style (their words, not mine) two guitar harmony bit. I know this is a staple of many Metallica songs and I don’t necessarily dislike it, but they will never top the one from the middle bit of Master of Puppets, so maybe they should retire this aspect now?

Room of Mirrors is the kind of song you can headbang to and together with the title track, I think it’s the only other proper thrash metal song on this album. More harmony guitar here. Actually, this one’s really good. Forget what I said about them needing to pack it in.

And then we come to Inamorata (which apparently means a person’s female lover). Lars informed us that this is Metallica’s first song that exceeds 10 minutes (it’s actually just over 11), but I didn’t believe him because he has a tendency to talk a load of shite at times, so I checked. There’s a 9:30 on Death Magnetic and a 9:46 and a 9:49 on …And Justice for All, but the much derided Lulu abomination with Lou Reed contains two songs over 11 minutes and one over 19 and the Mercyful Fate medley on Garage Inc. clocks in at 11:11. Therefore, you’re taking out of your hat, Mr Oilrig. Anyway, Inamorata is a bloody long song, that’s something we can all agree on. The most impressive thing is, it manages to be good without being overindulgent. “That’s the best song on the album,” a woman seated in the same row as me loudly declared as it finished. Steady on, it’s not that good.

So, on to my final judgement. For years, I’ve told anyone who’d listen (and plenty who wouldn’t) that Metallica after their first four albums (sometimes I’ll also allow their fifth album too) is not worth listening to. But in 72 Seasons, they’ve finally produced something that I like. They almost managed this with Death Magnetic, but that album was badly let down by poor production. As much as I’d like them to, Metallica are never going to return to sounding exactly like they did in the ‘80s, but this album represents about the best you’ll ever get out of four blokes who are now all around 60 and crucially, THERE ARE NO FUCKING BALLADS!